A collection of my poems!

Happy Birthday...

2008-05-20T06:23:00.000-07:00

Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday to you...

I'm sitting here with a few friends;
A piece of cake in front of me.
A knife in hand, I could have another use for...
A silent tear, knowing you are missing....

And girl can you hear me calling you?
Can you protect me from out there...
I feel so lost without you...
This is such a lonely feeling...

Flying high, as fast as I can;
Is the only way to lose this frustration.
You've got all and I, nothing;
Without you life is such a lonely feeling.

And I tear the tag from my suitcase;
Crying in pain, at this slap on my face..
The girl I was born for, had left me for another..
But why did it have to be on this day...
Did you really want to see me cry on my birthday?

Its been a year now, and maybe im tired of crying;
Yet, I still lie when I say i'm fine.
You know I still will always love you;
And it just hurts me so much knowing,
without you, life has no meaning...

And as I struggle to keep the tears inside me...
I hear a song I don't ever want to hear...

Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday to you..

One day I'll fly away...

2008-02-22T05:48:00.000-08:00

Drifting away...no matter where you are...
Flying...hurting...smiling...wanting....
Somethings wrong...I can't go on
Someone help me fly away...

I take my time...I have everything I want
He holds your hands and I drop down
Do I want to live in this world?
I'd rather fly away...

Miles and miles...endless space.
As I take the wings to the sky...
Someone tell her what I'm going through!
And God, let me come closer to you!

Twisted dreams..tortured soul
The times I cried, keeping things inside
There's no way...I know I have to go away
One day I'll fly away...One day I'll fly away....

The girl I called Babes...

2008-02-16T11:09:00.000-08:00

I always thought I could stand on my own;
till the day you left me all alone.
Now I can hardly make it through;
Come back, babes...All I want is you...

I'm in such pain, can't you see;
You know I love you more than me.
So I'm begging you on my knees;
come back, babes...please...

Your arms were the walls to our home;
But now the boundaries are broken.
I just cannot take this burden;
come back babes...my heart's all broken...

Life seems so cruel without you near me;
I promise to keep you as happy as you want to be...
You made me laugh, cry, love just by your sight;
Come back, babes...I just cannot cry another night...

You know you loved me before;
Can't you give it a try, once more.
I will love you, till I finally pass away;
Come back, babes...atleast for a day...

Why aren't you being sorry!

2008-02-03T10:23:00.000-08:00

I don't know why;
you ever took such a stride...
If insecurity was the issue;
shouldnt i be the culprit!

Its been six months now...
I'm still wiping those tears.
while he is playing with yours...
and maybe you were right...

I should move on...;
but dont you ever feel sorry...
I'm living in such misery;
while you are basking in his glory.

Its not fair this thing we call love;
where one feels pain and the other nothing!
I wish your thoughts stop haunting me;
the way you stopped wanting me.

I wonder at the times you looked into my eyes;
but actually saw someone else...
you have shattered my dreams;
sadly i still live with all the spirit...

And im crying out for you;
but you just dont see me...
come back...you know ill always be by your side;
If anything, for this you will never be sorry!

When love is an eternal wait....

2007-11-20T21:17:00.000-08:00

Under the balcony, below her roof;
the boy stands singing for her.
And he does it everyday without fail,
her windows are closed, she has company for dinner,
but he still sings for her.

"listen to me, now and forever,
I'm hurting and i'm crying,
these days I have lost sleep,
my heart aches and i cannot breathe.

I try to be happy because you are happy,
But deep down it all seems so wrong.
I wish i am still in there somewhere...
Somewhere in your heart!

You asked me to move on, that I had to,
And I died the moment I heard that.
But I understand why you would say it,
Though it still hurts. A lot.

I just want all this to stop,
and go back in time.
when you were in my arms...
it wasn't so far back...
when I was yours.
And you were mine...

But life will go on,
The wind now blows in another direction,
What cruel tricks fate plays.
You're in my life one day,
and now you have just gone away.

Sometimes I wish I could turn around and die,
but love is a funny game,
all this just reminds me about you
and I end up loving you all over again.

So baby, enjoy the company, but remember,
Ill be waiting here, i wont disappear.
I might shed a tear.
But I still will be waiting here

Under the balcony, below her roof
her windows were closed, she had company for dinner
the boy stood singing for her
"Like moonlight was always meant to shine
baby, i still wish you were mine...."

Coming back to life.

2007-10-31T08:34:00.000-07:00

Hey how are you..
I'm doing great...life is good...
keep in touch...take care

Did you just think of me again...
do I still matter to you?
do you not have someone else now,
Am I not an after thought?

People still ask me what happened;
I say I don't know, but all I do know is;
you entered my life, reached my heart,
plucked my heart and threw it away.

And all I ask for is my life...
the one you snatched away;
I'm sick of crying....
I'm glad I'm not drinking....

I wish I had it in me to tell you;
"Excuse me, but you are in my way"
and to shout out aloud -
"I can get someone better than you"...

But I am weak and hurt;
and I know I cannot wait longer,
I have to grow stronger,
taller, better, faster, smarter.

And there are things I will cherish;
You touched me in ways no one ever could.
but its time I go away'
Its time to say goodbye....

And everytime I move away I get your mail:

Hey how are you..
I'm doing great...life is good...
keep in touch...take care

I apologise.

2007-09-20T23:45:00.000-07:00

I apologise to you...my past,
not knowing truth for what it is...
I apologise for holding on...
for letting hope control my heart...
I apologise for not speaking out,
for not letting this pain inside me free...

I'm sorry for letting you go..
And sorry that I just don't give up
but I love you still, I hope you know

I apologise for not being;
what you asked me to be...
I apologise for not holding on to you stronger
when you backed away from me
I apologise for not asking questions
because you asked me not to try...

I'm sorry for never being brave
I tried the hardest I could...
but you were too far away to save...

And I hope you know that
although you walked away from me
I'll be the one my heart will blame

So here is my late goodbye
just ignore the tears that fall...
even though my heart burns and I cry

I apologise that I will have moments
When I think of us at our best
and when you read all these, please know...
It's just the end that I regret....

Rain, rain go away.

2007-09-18T18:13:00.000-07:00

In the night;
with the candle still burning bright;
I lay all alone, with no one else in sight...

With the rains still pouring hard;
It felt as though the whole world was crying for me.

You were gone...but how I wish I could be with you now;
Can someone help me reach you? I just don't know how...

In the day, thinking of you makes me weep;
while the nights have just stolen my sleep!

while you said goodbye and took your final breath;
It was me...who died a silent death...

And as the one tear fell of me;
It blew off the mystic shapes of the candle flame.

I don't have anythin else to say...
Rain rain go away...Rain rain go away.

Broken Glass

2007-09-17T06:15:00.000-07:00

The smoke's got my life all dazy;
Another cigarette lit, another minute lost...
And as the cigarette disappears, so will I...

6 months later, its all just the same...
Tired of convincin you, tired of this pain...
Just haven't seen sunshine...life just seems so empty

Tired of banging that glass on the table;
Wishing I could let the broken glass shred my heart
Coz you seem to have stained my heart;

My heart forces me to take ownership
of this life I refuse...
Guess Its time I leave...to destination unknown

And yet I wish I could blame you for all of this...
Sadly there is nothing evil in what you have done...

Except leaving me behind....

Incomplete!

2007-09-03T21:54:00.000-07:00

In my school's campus
where childhood love blooms
I met this beautiful girl
Oh how happy I was...

And as i spoke to her
My lips trembled so...
And as we finally fell in love...
I cried while kissing her...

Now she's gone and I wish I could see her
To ask her if she still loves me
And tell her that my heart aches!
coz life without her...

seems so incomplete!

Don't say goodbye!

2007-08-19T23:10:00.000-07:00

I look away and I smile...
Guess I have cried enough...
And at the end of my life

I tried and I failed
Guess I never got what I wanted...
And at the end of my life

I'm dying and I have lost it
Guess I wanted to hold you hand
And at the end of my life

I still say:
It takes a minute to say hello;
and forever to say goodbye!

A tear in my pillow

2007-08-04T05:05:00.001-07:00

I'm starin at the ceiling and its late in the night,
Wishing you'll come back, but that seems nowhere in sight.
I'm tossing and turning and im dreamin of you
I dreamt you'd be back, and how i wish dreams come true.

I wake up to find me alone and a tear starts to roll
I'm weeping quietly with the pillow that I hold
Every single day I pray for you, my love.
The first time i saw you, i felt you were an angel from above.

And I prayed to god " Oh please make her my bride to be"
Fate decided otherwise and I cried " why did it have to be me"
And still I wake up alone with a tear in my pillow.
Wondering If I should call you just to say Hello.

Thinkin about you all the time, sometimes messes up my head
And I fall asleep, not sad but dreaming of you instead...
And this is what happens to me every single night.
I pray that you are beside me and switch on the light.

But all i see is a tear in my pillow.
All I see is a tear in my pillow...

A tear in my pillow - PART 2

2007-08-04T05:05:00.000-07:00

So, I'm in bed, tryin my best to sleep.
Its been a fine day, i aint gonna think deep...
hmm, good thoughts about you, thats fine...
It will be a new day soon and ill rise and shine.

Do you ever think of me, I sometimes wonder?
Damn, here I go again and my mind starts to wander...
Then I imagine you lyin besides me;
Hugs and kisses all over my body.

It feels so real, I sense you are near;
And you say "Honey, I love you' in my ear.
I smile and say "I love you too"
Wishing that this will one day come true.

And then I fall asleep thinking about you;
In my dreams all this seems so true.
Look in your dream and tell me what you see?
Every now and then is it me? is it me?

I keep telling myself you will be mine tommorow...
Half awake, I get up and adjust my pillow...
Then my eyes open and you are nowhere to be seen!
And I feel so lonely
ONCE AGAIN!

Missing you like crazy...

2007-08-04T04:59:00.000-07:00

Sittin on the porch, its raining...
I cant escape the rain
I cant escape this pain!
And I'm missing you like crazy...

Babes, I love you
still do,
and im still crying,
and I'M missing you like crazy....

little drops hitting the window pane..
I'm goin insane...
Sitting alone in solitude
And I'm missing you like crazy....

The thunders' crashin down...
I'm losing my mind
Tryin to erase memories...
And I'm missing you like crazy....

And all the people, they feel ashamed...
Everyday is another today...
Its just the months that change....
And I'm missing you like crazy...

re: The letter - a reply!

2007-08-04T04:56:00.001-07:00

Hey hi,
Yes, I'm fine and just read your mail;
Waited for it every single day, without fail!
Yes I'm hurt, but I dont need any pity.
I always loved you, so I have moved away with dignity.

I wanted to be with you too, but I was away;
If I really had a choice, I would have never wanted it this way.
Someone needs me at home, we dont talk much, but he is ailing;
he has no one now and if im not here, as a son i'd be failing.

On the other hand I have a career which is waitin;
Wish, we'd have managed this phase and still continued datin'
Coz in a year, I was ready to ask for your hand;
Holdin hands,being in love on our very own island!

Everyone knows it’s been like this from the start
And I have loved you with every beat of my heart.
Cause you’re my first love and you’re the last
There can't be another, I’ve pledged you my heart.

Find someone better, but I hope he never hurts you;
Coz you should never feel what i'm goin through.
Thats why I ask you to love someone...
who loves you more than you do...

I guess this is all I want to say...
Thank you and have a nice day!

The Letter.

2007-08-04T04:54:00.000-07:00

Dear Madhu,
Hey hi, How are things with you?
I'm fine and hope to hear the same from you!
I know you mailed, but I just ain't callin
'Move on Madhu and please stop tryin'

Things don't stop, you need to carry on!
Life is beautiful, so what if i'm gone...
Just dont do anythin stupid and use your mind.
For a guy like you, someone else shouldnt be hard to find...

Things just happened, I don't know why;
But dont blame yourself and it wasn't another guy.
I want you to be happy, for that you need to try!
And ill be happy too when the captain soars high!

I do know thats its no longer you and me;
but what the future holds even i cannot foresee..
Its not like you didnt love me or you just didnt care.
But everytime I missed you, you just werent there...

Madhu, make me yesterday's news from today.
I know, this is gonna be difficult no matter what I say
But if something ever happens to you anyday!
Just remember I'll just be a call away...

to be continued...

You and me...

2007-08-04T04:46:00.000-07:00

You walk by, with a flower in your hand
I standby with wept tears in mine...

You smile as he puts his hand on your shoulder
I smile when friends put their hands on mine...

You talk about things a few months down the line
I think of us a few months back in time...

You tell me its no use,and i have to start anew
Its just that I cant get used to living without you

You look upon my misery with a pitiful sigh
And yet in your memories let me live and let me die

You are someone every guy would love to get
and yet, you are someone I wish I had never met...

The man who could never say goodbye

2007-08-04T04:45:00.000-07:00

How many tears must a man cry
before he decides to finally say goodbye?
how many times does he give up his life
when he knows there is no calm in the tide...

why dont we accept that
not'all love stories are success stories
and that a thing of beauty;
can always have uncertain glories...

but;

when was it said that if one person
moves on,the other shouldnt weep
or cant it be that the other can still
love her till he finally goes to sleep

I am no god, nor am i a saint
why ask me to move on and forget her
when you know i was, am;
and will always be in love with her....

When life is a dream

2007-08-04T04:38:00.000-07:00

Someone said you have moved on and are happy...
I said I have moved on too but why am I lying?
Someone said you have moved on...

The stars tell me a different story
But even they get clouded as it rains tears...
the stars tell me a different story...

I will fight my lonliness with the world
Just go away from me completely...
I will fight this lonliness alone

Asking me to forget you is not possible, how can i?
You were real, not a dream and i loved you
asking me to forget you is not possible...

All those memories, how do i forget
that day for our marriage which we cannot reach
All those memories, how do i forget?

Oh how I will give away all this for one smile of yours...
if only you'd let me meet you once...
How I will give this all away for one last smile of yours...

The last supper

2007-08-04T04:26:00.000-07:00

You have finally spoken
You let me heart broken...
Said its over I don't love you no more...
The pain is too much aint walkin that lane anymore,

But tell me where did I go wrong?
This pain I cant endure any long...
Tell me how do I save my life...
Im in sadness, dont want any more strife...

Begging on my knees...
Asking you for one last dinner...
Whats there for you to lose?
How much more can i let you bruise?

I know I am no one to make you wait
If you have someone else, I still debate...
Yet we talk, you still care...
Just unable to erase those memories we share....

Let us meet for a final goodbye
Keep an open mind babes, Give it one last try
Mistakes are what we learn from
But I will never learn to say goodbye!

So Vulnerable

2007-08-04T04:20:00.000-07:00

As I see you kiss him
I feel angry...
As I see him hugging you
I feel hurt...
As I see two happy faces
I feel disgusted...

Why do you leave me so vulnerable?
Why am i so powerless?
Why on earth did it all go wrong?

I hate those 7 words you say
Sorry I am just your friend now...
I hate those 7 words you say...
I think I have feelings for someone
I hate those 7 words you say..
I dont see us being together again...

Why do you leave me so vulnerable?
Why am I so powerless?
Why on earth did it all go wrong?

I guess I need to move on...
Life is beautiful it just goes on...
Just remember what i gave you was pure love...
And thats why I never hurt you...the one I truly loved...

Once in a while do look at me...

2007-08-04T04:06:00.000-07:00

I know you are gone, But I still do love you
Once in a while, I'd love to look at you
Once in a while, I'd love to talk to you
Once in a while, I'd love to smile with you

Isn't it funny, its all over, and yet life's not over..
don't you see the pain in my eyes..
don't you ever cry the way i did...
don't you miss me the way i do you..

But if ever we were to meet one day
See us being fine
See us happy the way you want me...
See us smile about those days

And when the meeting's over and you bid adieu
I shall cry silent tears then
I shall play with your kids and wish they were ours
I shall wait to see you one more time..

I know you are gone, But I still do love you
Once in a while, I'd love to look at you
Once in a while, I'd love to talk to you
Once in a while, I'd love to smile with you

Footprints in the sands of time..

2007-08-02T08:22:00.000-07:00

Me to her
Oh, how I dreamt that one day you will possess me,
How beautiful will you look when I ask for your hand,
As we walk, holding hands the ring will be shining,
Glistening, in the sun as we walk thro' the sand.

But the beach seems empty
I don't see anyone besides me?
Why do I not see your footprints in the sand?
Maybe you are gone but was I not worthy of your hand?

Be happy wherever you are, but if someone ever hurt you
During such times of despair, I will always carry you...

God to me
Remember when you were walking along the beach
What you gave her, is what I always preach
Love someone for what they are, not what you want them to be
I'm showin her the light, but for that she has to open her eye

And everytime you saw your footprint in the sand
and there was only one pair, she had already taken her stand
This is life and everything here happens for good
I'm proud of you, and I know you did all you could...

But when you needed me the most, dont think i left you
During such times of despair it was then that I carried you

The paintng part 2.

2007-08-02T08:14:00.000-07:00

It's ok in the day, as I try to stay busy!
But I still wonder how and where she is!
I'm sick of crying, but I'm not drinkin' yet
Why does her love seem so hard to get?

Every minute is spent thinkin of her
But a post mortem doesnt get the lost back
Sittin under the shower, the water's flowing,
But its the tears thats really hurtin!

I want to paint her a picture;
about the way i feel.
She knows my love for her is strong
Yet it hurts that it all went wrong!

Decisions in a relationship are made by two
I opened my heart to her and she did so to
I was here and she was there, were we missing something?
Wish i was given a year and a half to pop her the ring!

I want to paint her a picture;
about the way I feel.
We holding hands, walking together, being in love all day
It's never too late, before it all fades away

The Painting...

2007-08-02T08:05:00.001-07:00

A simple dream of being forever yours...
We spending time, every day a few hours...
beautiful kids, we'd have two...
Me holding one kid, and the other with you...

Their evenings would be in the garden swingin'
Holdin hands in the garden we'd be walkin;
Sittin alone in the garden, I get such memoirs
Smilin, wishing these kids could have been ours!

But should I hate whats been done...
When the damage can never come undone...
Hatred cannot end hatred, love alone can
Just be happy girl, and this from an also ran...

Maybe one day you will know of my role..
I've set a target, and you are my goal!
The heaviness of being so much in love with you
Has been replaced by the lightness of startin all over again

I see our future being painted in a future not so far...
But If not me I'll still be happy wherever you are...

Up up and away!

2007-08-02T07:59:00.000-07:00

The wings are clipped,
I'm dying one day at a time...
I feel rejected and lost
it seems the whole world is against me...

all hope seems lost, but the spirit remains
I'm dying one day at a time....
i resolve to fly no matter what...
I still wait to know whats my crime..

Nothing should stop me now, i wont be satisfied
I'm living one day at a time...
the pain is inevitable i still aim for the sky
nothin can stop me, not a penny nor a dime

And i fly, but i still cant touch the sky
I'm living one day at a time...
the past is painful,the future can behold
my owner will realise it was always me...

the sky is beautiful, the world is brown
im hoping one day at a time...
only if she wanted, will i come down...
I'm praying one day at a time...
only if she wanted, will i come down...

My doors are always open.

2007-08-02T07:52:00.000-07:00

When someone breaks your heart;
and leaves you in pain and suffering.
Come to me then my love...
My doors will always remain open to you...

Now you dont need me, now you feel relieved;
Your beauty can now capture a million hearts.
Now your beauty is beyond compare...
Even a rose withers near you...

But if ever something happens to you;
And you feel your life is not as good...
Come to me then my sweetheart;
I'll be in my knees begging you to come back.

There are no contracts in love...
I know I lost when you said you dont love me anymore...
But if you see darkness in your life and have nowhere to go;
The candles outside my house will still be shining bright...

When someone else breaks your heart ;
and leaves you in pain and suffering.
Come to me then my love;
My doors will always be open to you...

Its a late goodbye!

2007-08-02T07:43:00.000-07:00

As days turn to months, and months to years
No one will remember what I went through or my silent tears
I'll just be another desperate broken heart...
They will blame it on the distance which made us apart...

I'll live in isolation living with regret
That the only person I truly loved I couldnt get...
I know that the time that has gone Ill never get back
The only time I have is now and that seems off-track

Two kids holding hands, running with each other smiling
Suddenly you let go off me and keep running....
I can't keep pace,I feel lost as I wanted to run the last mile with you
Still running, you turn back, smile and say a late goodbye

I now walk alone,run alone live alone and sleep alone
When I'm dead, you will read about a sad man on my tombstone...
I can have only one real mother and there can be only one you
I have no choice but to live life this way...

All your love letters are now read and piled up
I sometimes wonder if you have thrown mine in the fire...
All that was mine with you, have left no sentiments or desire...
A yet there is nothing I can say or do, you have already said goodbye

I feel like a pauper foolishly in love with a princess...
My tears washing away the dream I had painted in canvas...

But I'm sorry I can never let go...
Maybe this this love...
I'm sorry I can never let go...
Maybe this really is love...

A question to all of you...

2007-08-02T07:39:00.000-07:00

There was this boy and there was this girl;
And they loved each other just like anyone else.
And the captain would call her every single day;
Be it london, new york, India or norway.

And when he reached base, they still spoke to each other;
In his industry there were a lot of girls but he loved her like no other.
Somehow she started missing him as he was always away...
And one day called it off much to his dismay...

And he looked back at the times he went over to meet her;
It was for a day or two but even then he couldnt be with her.
He took her along to people and places instead of just being together;
And though he didnt realise it, she felt their love go weaker...

And when it hit him hard, he wanted to cut himself to pieces;
The plane he was carrying to crash and burn him to ashes.
But he was scared to do so and cried himself to tears;
And if she didnt come back he would be lonely for years...

He knows he made a mistake but deserves chance;
Anything that can make her give me another glance
she is 22 now and he 25, he loves her like crazy and thats his question to you...
What does he do? should he wait or regret this forever and bid her adieu...

The Baton

2007-08-02T07:23:00.000-07:00

The wait's long enough, I'm third in the circuit...
The prize sittin on the table is my only pursuit...
I call this life's relay and its coming a full circle...
My life's biggest dream could now become all fruitful!

The race has already begun, our team is doing fine...
All i need is the baton and reach the finish line
The first runner is running and he takes his time...
With the baton the cup would always be mine...

And finally the second runner passes it on to me...
All this wait, I feel is finally worth while
I know it will take time for me to reach the finish line
But I keep running, hoping i dont drop the baton..

I hear friends cheering, I can sense life moving..
but all I see is the prize thats waitin for me...
Suddenly it seems so near...in a few metres i would cross the finish line
Suddenly I see this other guy, snatching it away...

And before I realise, he has already made his way
The cup seems distant...the crowds are still cheering
But everything around me comes to a standstill...
He wins the race and lifts the cup...

And they all congratulate me...but I feel I lost...
The cup I always wanted to lift is now someone elses
The crowds ask me not to feel disappointed
They said, did you like it when you were running the race...

I said yes...You were the best of the lot,look at it that way then,
But now its time to pass on the baton...

Hope

2007-08-02T07:10:00.000-07:00

The wings are clipped,
It seems the whole world is against me...
I feel rejected and lost
I'm dying one day at a time...

All hope seems lost, but the spirit remains
I still wait to know whats my crime..
I resolve to fly no matter what...
I'm dying one day at a time....

Nothing should stop me now,I wont be satisfied
nothing can stop me, not a penny nor a dime
the pain is inevitable, I still aim for the sky
I'm living one day at a time...

I fly, but i still cant touch the sky
my owner will realise it was always me...
the past is painful but the future can behold
I'm living one day at a time...

The sky is beautiful, the world seems brown
I'm hoping one day at a time...
only if she wanted, will i come down...
I'm praying one day at a time...
only if she wanted, will i come down...

A welcome note.

2007-08-02T06:57:00.000-07:00

Warm regards to one and all...
I am not sure why I created this blog, but I guess I had a few poems I had written and felt this could be a decent medium to showcase it.
Guess this is where I end.
Happy reading.
Madhusudan